I have 97 matches right now.
OVERWHELMING.
It’s foreign on this side August 15, 2007
Okay, so I admit I’m a dating amatuer. It’s kind of lame, but there we have it. When it comes to all these endless matches filling up my eH inbox, I just don’t know what to do with them all.
Do I initiate action? (so against “real life” dating philosophy that’s been drilled into me for years)
Do I wait for some guy to want to communicate with me? (which has worked stellar-y for years now)
Seriously, how does this work? How soon do I close a match? How much leeway to I give for a crappy profile (none if they’ve answered all the questions like they were writing a text message, very little if A Purpose Driven Life is listed as their favorite book)? How much do I chalk up to different personalities, not knowing if it’s a deal breaker or not (the guy who had no ifs, ands or buts about never using birth control ever… he was a deal breaker).
A friend of mine challenged me to initiate communication with 3 guys, and I’ve done that and with a couple more too. One hard thing about this, I’ve realized, is that you don’t know who has actually signed up for eH and who has only filled out the personality profile for free in moments of boredom (like I first did a year ago). You’re matched with both and can’t differentiate between the two. Are guys not responding because they’re not actually a member of eH? Because they’re not interested? Because they’re on vacation, or too busy, as I have been? It’s a weird dynamic. Not that I’m freaking out or waiting with baited breath or anything, I just don’t know how to proceed.
I am in communication with this guy Adam now. He’s a couple years younger than me, which is fine, and from SC (I live in FL). I’m not sure how interested I am, but we’ll see.
The anti-BC guy wanted to start communication too, but I didn’t want to get some guys hopes up when there was no way that if this actually miraculously worked out, that I was going to be one of those girls who gets pregnant on her honeymoon. ::shudder:: Best to close that down now.
Oh, I did change my picture settings to not show it until the 1st questions are exchanged. FYI.
I have no fear of drowning (it’s the breathing that’s taking all this work) August 15, 2007
So far, I’ve been pretty overwhelmed by this eHarmony experience. I haven’t had much time to spend sorting through all my matches lately so they’ve been piling up. Everytime I open my email inbox, I have at least one (if not 2 or 3) sets of emails from eHarmony saying that they’ve got 7 new matches for more. Luckily(?), by the time I see that and end up signing in, several have closed the match. Never did I imagine I’d be so pumped about closed matches. Right now I have 66 matches to sort through, but it’s still early in the day. It makes me tired just looking at it.
Unlike Carla, my picture is readily available on the site, though I may change that for the reason she listed – I might know others on the site in “real life.” I don’t know what it is that is so off-putting to me that others may know that I’m doing this, but at present time only 4 of my friends know I’m doing this, Carla included. I haven’t even told a couple of my very best friends yet. I was matched with a guy on here who I’m pretty sure I know and work with, which would be a major reason I may change my picture settings. The last thing I need is everyone I know at work (not that small of a place, but the kind of place where you live your life in a fishbowl) to know about this and to be asking about it.
This is a pretty jumbled post. Hopefully the next will be more coherant.
P.S. I just stumbled upon this on Google: “Internet Dating: The Musical” – hilarious!
There’s more to me than what you see August 12, 2007
I’ve been on eharmony for nearly two weeks now. I’ve been “matched” with several men, have closed several matches and have moved through the phases into “open communication” with two. But my favorite stories (so far) relate to my photos.
Of course pictures are the first thing I see when I receive a new match–followed quickly by age, faith and how often he drinks. I often don’t read the rest of his profile for days. I’m just not in a rush.
However, I have my photos set such that I show them to matches when I decide I’m ready. Mostly that’s because I know I could be paired with people I actually know–or worse, that I’ve already been out with. (Think I’m crazy? It happened on day one.)
So last week I had a match–who had not even initiated contact!–close the connection because he couldn’t see my photos. That cracked me up. (And frankly, I wasn’t interested in him.)
But it gets better. A few days ago, a guy asked to see my photos, so I let him. The next time I logged on, he had closed the match!
No wonder women are so paranoid about our appearances. Good thing I’m cuter than him, anyway. Otherwise I might be offended. 
I’m diving in August 12, 2007
I’m no stranger to Internet dating. I’ve tried nearly every site at some point: a three day trial (OK, multiple three day trials) on match, a discounted week on eharmony, true when it was still free for women. But my credit card and I have never really taken the plunge. It’s been nearly a source of pride–although I don’t know why. I’ve had plenty of friends who have tried Internet dating, and I was even a bridesmaid in a wedding where the couple met on match.com.
But I’ll admit, I’ve been curious whether it would work. So when Megan told me months ago that a friend suggested she sign up for eharmony, I was on board. She should do it, I said, and to take it a step further, I would sign up for a site adn we could blog about our experiences.
On a recent Saturday, I got a text from Megan. She was ready.
Megan had an unreal discount code: three months for $45. The same length of time on match would cost $60. It’s not a huge difference, but enough to make me consider my options. I’ve preferred match in the past, but eharmony’s system isn’t really designed for a short-term commitment. I also asked a friend about her experiences using both. She’s met more Christian men on eharmony than match. When I thought about it, I realized that the best contenders I’ve met on match were also on eharmony.
So I took the plunge. Heck, I’ll do almost anything for a good story–and if there’s one thing dating has brought me, it’s good stories.
This is what happens when I say “never.” August 1, 2007
Hi, my name is Megan, and I recently decided to throw off all my inhibitions and sign up for eHarmony. I’ve long been that girl who has sworn never to do internet dating “never, ever, ever, no thanks, never” but yet, here I am. With the heavy encouragement of a few friends, the fact that everyone I know is either seriously dating or newly married and my own introspection, envisioning the cold and lonely future of an old maid, I decided to take the plunge. Getting a 60% off code for 3 months of eHarmony in my inbox finally sealed the deal.
I chose eHarmony because of that deal. Sometime last fall I filled out the free personality profile at a time in my life that I had nothing but time on my hands and was one of the seemingly few who was not rejected from the service. This instantly began filling my inbox with discount offers which I quickly deleted lest someone see an email for eHarmony over my shoulder in a public place. Something about the idea of internet dating just sounded sour to me, like I was finally admitting defeat in the “normal” dating world. Heck, I don’t even like being seen holding a dating book at Barnes&Noble. But I can see God doing something in my life and have decided to make some “personal growth steps” and see where this goes. Anyways, it’s only 3 months until the price skyrockets and I cancel my subscription. 
Here’s to a 3 month adventure!
